Don't stop believing...

We all know and love that favorite Journey anthem... "Don't Stop Believin"  Admit it, you crank up the volume when the chorus starts and belt it out like the rest of us!

The words "Don't stop believing" are words that have been my mantra throughout this process thus far. You have to keep your eyes on the finish line and believe with all of your heart that you can make it there.

It takes faith, determination, purpose, drive, courage and a giant helping of hope to adopt. I ask God every day to equip me with those tools. Patience is another trait in which I am very much lacking but through this I am slowly calming down and just waiting on His timing.

I still worry about the money...where is it coming from...how will we ever have enough? But He will provide so I need to use my patience and wait.

The gift from my husband for Christmas this year is a necklace with a couple of crosses and the word "Believe" and it serves as a reminder that if we believe God is faithful and just and humble ourselves to His will then He will make a way. He has not let me down yet....

So I will keep wearing this necklace and I will never stop believing that I will hold my baby in my arms soon.

I got the husband I cried to God for so many years ago after my last ugly break-up. I threw my hands up and told God I was done picking out men He was going to have to send me one because I was giving up.  Two weeks later Kevin showed up, coincidence? I think not! And it was perfect timing.

I know once I give up trying to control the situation that God will take over and my child will come home. I am so excited! Keep us in your prayers because the more prayers for this the better.

Don't stop believin'!!!!

Paper paper paper...a tree bravely gave it's life so I could have a child.

Recently Kevin went to Office Depot and bought an ink cartridge for our home printer. He called me from the store and asked me if he should get the XL cartridge (which prints triple the amount that the regular cartridges print) of course me in my constant effort to save money I told him to opt for the cheaper one.

Well...200 pages printed later I am rethinking my choice!  We have many more pages to go.

I have been glad to give the social worker every bit of information about me and my husband, I consider it a joy to know that all of this paperwork and trying to remember dates and addresses and different information about jobs in our past.

If all of this makes me a mommy I am ok with giving them all the info they want..not just ok with it I am excited to give it to them!

Many of us take for granted all of the blessings we have in our life and I want to take the time to say how grateful I am for all of the people in my life.

From those who bought cake pops, t-shirts, coffee to those like my sister, my mom's boss and my friends who have just gone on our PayPal and donated their hard earned money.

I cannot find the words to even express how much you have touched our lives and in turn will touch the live of a child who otherwise may never have known the love of two parents and a whole network of family and friends who already adore him or her.

I also want to thank my precious mother who has been my rock and advocate from day one, she never lets my faith waiver she encourages me and prays for me and I couldn't do this without her support.

I want to thank my Mother in law she is also a support to Kevin and I and has helped tremendously with offering to help with our upcoming cook book fundraiser. I know she prays for us too and I couldn't be happier that she is my mother in law.

I want to thank Mamaw. I am so glad I have her in my life after the loss of my own precious grandmother . To marry my husband and gain a Mamaw is a huge blessing to me. She holds us in prayer. She took the time to hand write over 25 recipes for our cookbook and mailed them to us. What a blessing she is and that really touched my heart. A truly Godly woman.

Ok little baby Barnard you can come home now! You have a whole bunch of people waiting to meet you and who will be a huge part of your life. We already love you and can't wait to be a forever family.  We have a pretty awesome family you will love them all!

New fundraiser! #3

New fundraiser!!!  Selling coffee!! Hoping we have a little something for everyone!!

www.justlovecoffee.com/barnardbabydreaming

Congratulations you are Paper Pregnant!

I heard the term paper pregnant this week. I was curious what that meant. Well, a lot of adoptive parents use that term when they are waiting on their adopted child to come home, much like an expectant mother awaits the birth of her child.

So, I am pregnant!  Words I thought I would never get to say in my lifetime. While I may not be pregnant physically, we are mentally expecting. Paper pregnant! 

I may not know what my baby will look like, his or her gender or race but he or she is already loved immensely. I may not be actually pregnant, but I like the term "paper pregnant" because even though I am not carrying my baby in my tummy I am carrying them in my heart.

I am in this nesting phase where I want the nursery to be perfect but I can't really decorate until we receive our referral and know the gender. I started the babies library with books I saved from when I was a child and some Dr. Seuss classics.

A lot of the time they say that it is human nature to fear the unknown,  although I know this is going to be tough I am so much more excited than afraid. I give God the credit for that. He has given me peace. The only thing I really know for absolutely positively certain is that His hand is on this.

So for now I am paper pregnant.  Kevin thinks that is a really corny phrase, to me it is such a hopeful phrase. I agree it maybe a little cheesy but I like it and I am sticking to it.

A couple of paper pregnant t-shirts I saw were: 
"Am I showing yet? The answer is on my face not my belly"
Also:
" No morning sickness yet, but the paper cuts are terrible !"
Also:
"Mom to be: We just don't know when!"

I know those are silly but cute. It's nice to be able to laugh through the stress of waiting. A quote I saw on another blog put it perfectly :

Steps in the adoption process:
1. Drown in paperwork
2. Eat chocolate
3. Stalk postal worker
4. Act irrational
5. Wait
6. Wait some more!

So patience may not be a strength for me but I have a feeling through this process God is trying to teach me to be patient and to wait on His timing. We have the names picked out for a boy it will be Maddox Liam Barnard and for a girl Mackenzie Rose Barnard. I talk to Maddox and Mackenzie all of the time and tell them its time to come home, Mommy and Daddy are waiting with open arms and hearts to welcome them. Hurry home baby we can't wait to meet you.

Love,
Shannon

Fundraiser #2

So far we have raised a little over $5000.00 towards our ultimate goal of $30,000.00. We have been able to do that in a little over a month and that is phenomenal!

Provided byFund-Raising-Ideas-Center.com

Our next fundraiser is the Domestic Diva cookbooks. Please let me know if you would like to sell some to your friends, families, co-workers and neighbors. We will give them to people to sell as many as they can for a good cause.

Our goal with this fundraiser is to raise $1000.00 by selling 100 cookbooks at $15.00 a piece. The recipes are a combination of my personal recipes mixed with those of my family and friends. So if you want to submit a recipe send it to me so I can add it to my list.

We are so excited about all of those who have offered to help. Even if you cannot afford to donate just offering ideas and help for possible fundraisers is a huge help. We have some ideas for possible future fundraising ventures...spaghetti dinner, pancake breakfast, yard sales, selling unwanted items on eBay and Craigslist and we have our T-shirt website of which 25-45% of the proceeds go to our adoption fund . Click this banner to access that site go to "Family Fundraisers" and look for "Barnard Baby Dreaming " :




Thank you all for your continued prayers and support.
Love Shannon

My two cents

A long time ago I figured that if I ever got married there'd be a houseful of kids soon after. Well things don't always go like we figure.

Fast forward to now. Shannon and I are on this journey to start our family through adoption. It's a big undertaking. I wish I had words to describe all I feel throughout the day. I'm constantly trying to fathom that in a few months I'll be a dad...at 41. Oh it's a weird feeling to think I'll be 60 when our child graduates, yikes!

Some have wondered aloud about our decision to adopt a newborn. Shannon and I are in agreement. We want to experience all the firsts of our child. I can't imagine what it is like for my dear wife, but whatever I can do to make her desire to be a mommy come true I'm going to do just that. Like always we value your opinion, but it doesn't mean we're going to change a decision we've already made.

We desire your prayers and support and thank you for it in advance.

CLICK HERE to Order your adoption T-shirt!! Proceeds go to our adoption fund!!

Dealing with Opinions

One of the questions asked of us is why we want to adopt a newborn when there are thousands of older children waiting for homes.
  I can only answer that with this statement: I may never conceive, I may never feel a baby kick, I may never experience the joy of seeing and hearing my baby's heartbeat on a sonogram. I may never get to say oh he has Kevin's eyes or experience labor. 
I do not have control over those things. I must tell you that I most certainly want a newborn baby because I want to be there for all of my child's firsts. I want to hear their first word, see their first step and kiss their first boo boo.
I apologize to those who feel that makes me selfish but my desire to be a mother encompasses from day one on. I am missing a lot already and I don't want to give up the earliest part of my children's lives.
There may come a time when after we have adopted and our kids are older we will consider adopting an older child,  but for now a newborn baby is our dream.
I feel like those who have not experienced the hurt and emptiness of infertility can not comprehend the way you feel cheated and robbed of something you feel is your God-given right.
So we may face opposition and negativity from those who should support us it may dampen our spirits slightly. Nonetheless we shall stay the course and embark on this life altering journey to parenthood.
We understand people have opinions and in no way are we stating we are upset by them. We just want to make a blanket statement to express our feelings on the matter and why we have made the decisions we have.
Trust me adoption is not for the weak of heart and we still don't entirely know where all of this $30,000 is coming from but I do know this, where God guides, He provides. (Thank you Sandy Kaminsky for that quote it has been the underlying theme of this adoption process so far.)
Thank you all for you love and support. This is the most important thing we have done aside from our salvation and getting married. It's HUGE! We are so excited and so scared all at once
Love,
Shannon


Click Here to order an adoption t-shirt!!!

Provided byFund-Raising-Ideas-Center.com